Make Weeding Fun--No, Really!

Weeding Can Be More Fun, with a Little Imagination

When most people think of weeding, the word fun rarely comes to mind. After all, weeding is drudgery, a chore, a punishment that ranks up there with the rack and the thumbscrew, right? With a little imagination (okay, more than a little imagination), weeding can become enjoyable, even amusing. Read on for some decidedly tongue-in-cheek suggestions.

* Go Shakespearean on those weeds. Practice reciting the "Alas Poor Yorick" speech by Hamlet in The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark:, holding aloft a tuft of pulled weeds:

"Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one
now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen?
Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let
her paint an inch thick, to this favour she must
come; make her laugh at that." -- Act V, Scene 1

Really ham it up. As a variation, try reciting this speech in a falsetto voice. 

* Sing "Let It Go" from the Disney movie Frozen, at the top of your lungs, while you are picking weeds--preferably with a flourish. Even better: visualize an icy frost emanating from your fingers as you touch those weeds. Note: If you have small children or if your neighbors do, they will probably join you in singing "Let It Go." While they are singing, you might be able to get them to weed a bit on your behalf.

* Play poker, using the weeds as currency. This works better if you can convince up to three other people to join you in this activity. Seven Card Stud or Texas Hold'Em, anyone?

* Create a mini-bonfire for those pulled weeds (use a fire-safe container) and dance around the fire with wild abandon.

Happy weeding!

"Tripleurospermum perforatum 20041012 2572". Licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 via Wikimedia Commons - http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Tripleurospermum_perforatum_20041012_2572.jpg#mediaviewer/File:Tripleurospermum_perforatum_20041012_2572.jpg
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Mulching: A Practical Miracle

What Is Mulch?

Mulch is, usually, an organic covering to be heaped around growing plants. Mulch can consist of straw, fallen leaves, tree bark, chipped trees, and even cocoa hulls (NOTE: Do not use cocoa hulls if you have pets: chocolate in any form is toxic to dogs and cats); there is also a plastic mulch on the market. Mulch is  applied in order to discourage weeds (the botanical pest, not the television series) from appearing--I would be lying if I claimed that mulch entirely eliminated the need to weed--as well as to conserve water and to deliver nutrients, gradually, to the soil. As an added bonus, mulching can help mark the boundary between garden and yard--extremely helpful if you have a housemate who has no clue about gardening and what distinguishes garden from yard (yes, a fence would help too: that has not happened yet and probably will not during this season).

How to Mulch: One Method

The following mulching method works for me: water your garden well, and then spread a layer of compost on the ground, near and surrounding the plants. On top of this compost, spread a heaping layer of mulch--I prefer fallen leaves (hey, they're free) and then water the garden again to wet the leaves (or whatever you use as mulch). You may need to top off the mulch every three to four weeks. Otherwise, be secure in the knowledge that you have saved countless hours weeding and that you are conserving water, nutrients, and much-valued time--leaving you free to sit back and actually enjoy your gardening space.

What are your thoughts about mulching? Please feel free to share your insights in the comments section. 

Christine Matthews [CC-BY-SA-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
Mulched snowdrops

Weeding Woes

Weeding: The Necessary Chore

"That's Roman wormwood - that's pigweed - that's sorrel - that's piper-grass - have at him, chop him up, turn his roots upward to the sun, don't let him have a fibre in the shade, if you do he'll turn himself  t'other side up and be as green as a leek in two days.  A long war, not with cranes, but with weeds, those Trojans who had sun and rain and dews on their side.  Daily the beans saw me come to their rescue armed with a hoe, and thin the ranks of their enemies, filling up the trenches with weed dead.   May a lusty crest-waving Hector, that towered a whole foot above his crowding comrades, fell before my weapon and rolled in the dust." --  Henry David Thoreau, Walden, 1854

Let's face it: there's nothing sexy or appealing about weeding a garden. Of all the gardening chores, weeding is my least favorite. However, keeping weeds from stealing valuable water and nutrients from your plants is crucial. Below I have some suggestions in making weeding less onerous. 

1. Start weeding early in the growing season, and keep weeding throughout the life of this season's garden.Set aside 30 minutes to an hour each week, preferably in the cool of the morning, to tackle this chore. Don't let weeds get the upper hand.

2. Make weed pulling a meditative exercise: as you pull each weed, visualize removing a specific problem (money issues, for example) or character flaw (such as jealousy)  from your life.

3. You can also make weed pulling an exercise in emotional release. If something is bothering you, take it out on the weeds. Pull them, scream at them, stomp on them. Then, burn them in a fire-safe container. You will experience a much-need cathartic release and will feel much better. Of course, if your neighbors seem worried, you may need to explain to them and/or to the police what you're doing.

4. You can get even with some weeds by eating them: some weeds, such as dandelions, lamb's quarters, or purslane, are edible but should be picked young. Be sure you can identify a weed as edible; if in doubt, don't eat it. Also make sure that the weeds you pick are free from pesticides.

5. In order to reduce the need to weed, consider mulching your garden -- a topic for next time.

By Rosendahl [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons